


That's us

by orphan_account



Category: Golden Child (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Roommates, may contain some typos, roommates! bongbeom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-10-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:34:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27200497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: "Or maybe he’s really in love, he thinks when he sits in front of him one day, thinking how cute he looks, face buried in the bowl below, fully enjoying his meal, hair fooling around, dark locks shining as the sun craving a way through them."
Relationships: Bong Jaehyun/Kim Jibeom, Bong Jaehyun/Son Youngtaek | TAG
Comments: 8
Kudos: 13





	That's us

**Author's Note:**

> \- i'm sorry if this contain some errors, eng is not my native language  
> \- This has been on my drafts for over a year already, i made some changes but i don't know if it works hehe  
> \- Just posting it bc i miss bongbeom and there wasn't enough fics for them lately  
> \- There's a part2 but it's still in my head and i don't know if i'll ever write it.  
> \- please let me know your feedbacks  
> \- you can find me on twitter @bong_zara or my CC https://curiouscat.me/zahra__ if you want to ask anything

Jaehyun wasn’t the most beautiful person he ever met; he was somehow pretty, if he were to admit, especially with his hair dark, long, soft locks dancing gracefully onto his fair complexioned skin. He could’ve been prettier if acne scars weren’t visible on his bready cheeks, lips not matching each other when he speaks and nose looking weirder with every time his gaze is focused on it.  
Jaehyun wasn’t the smartest person he ever met and his grades show it. And while all students were fighting to excel, he was just struggling to pass. Jaehyun was naïve, he thinks, it shows when everyone is chatting and joking around, laughter reaching the cafeteria’s rooftop, he’s zoning out, mind nowhere to be around, lips slightly parted, eyes vacant, staring into nothing and everything.  
Jaehyun was certainly not the funniest person he ever met, he was boring in fact, he was silent most of the time but when his speaks, his stories were pretty lame even though he uses words he copied from Jangjun to make them seem funnier, yet everyone’s forced laughter could still be felt.  
Jaehyun wasn’t the most perfect person he ever met, and then why for god sake he’s glued to his mind, refusing to leave it!  
Donghyun was the one to blame, Jibeom thinks, they were having a peaceful lunch at the university’s cafeteria, when a confused, lost Jaehyun carrying his tray appeared, Donghyun waved and the boy headed towards them immediately.  
“Middle school friends”, Donghyun introduced, Joochan welcomed with a bright smile, but Jibeom just nodded, feeling his stomach turning, soup must be too spicy, he thinks.  
Jaehyun clung to them every lunch later even though he was majoring in a total different field. He failed to have friends, Jibeom concluded, and although he felt bad for the boy having hardships socializing, he felt burdened because he had to deal with his presence, with his mannerism for one whole hour. He was so sure that Jaehyun was a nice guy, and the boy showed nothing but kindness and sweetness to them. But Jibeom felt annoyed every time he shows up, there was something he didn’t like about him, something that made his stomach turn heavy and lunch was nothing but a torture ever since.  
Jaehyun get to know Jangjun and Seungmin and after that, he started to join them in their café meetings, their basketball matches and even their study group at the library. Jibeom’ suffering has worsened.  
\- Do you feel something weird about Jaehyun?  
He opened up to Joochan someday, hoping that he wasn’t the only one feeling the same way.  
\- Jaehyun? What’s wrong with him? He’s a nice guy though, a bit boring, but nice!  
Joochan’s answer was deceiving, however he dig in further  
\- I don’t know, something like discomfort maybe? I just feel uneasy when he’s around.  
\- Stop with this nonsense, the boy is unbelievably sweet and he enjoys our company what’s wrong with that. Unless you’re in love with him, I can’t see why you’re feeling this way!  
Joochan said that jokingly, but Jibeom felt like he was hit by a truck. Him in love with Jaehyun! No way!! Jaehyun wasn’t his type, not even close!  
Or maybe he’s really in love, he thinks when he sits in front of him one day, thinking how cute he looks, face buried in the bowl below, fully enjoying his meal, hair fooling around, dark locks shining as the sun craving a way through them.  
He’s probably in love, Jibeom thinks when he sits in front of him another day, Jangjun throwing some jokes and Jaehyun laughed, or at least that’s what Jibeom thought because the boy always covers his mouth with his palms when he laughs. Jibeom hated that, he wants to see his forever plump lips splitting, showing his porcelain like set of teeth in a form of a smile. He snapped suddenly:  
\- Stop with that!  
Jaehyun looked around confused, only to find out that Jibeom was actually talking to him.  
\- Stop with what? Jibeomie?  
Jibeom felt even angrier, jibeomie? What was that? What right does he have to call him that?  
\- That! stop covering you mouth with your hands! Are you a girl? Man up a bit!  
He could feel Jaehyun’s eyes widening and begin to water, the boy hung his head low, then mouthed «sorry» before taking his tray and leaving.  
He felt everyone’s eyes focused on him and he could hear some “Jibeom are you crazy” and “Jibeom what’s wrong with you” all the way.  
He fucked up! He realized, so he left following Jaehyun, and when he caught him on the corridor, he pulled him harshly by his wrist to some deserted place behind the building.  
\- Look I’m sorry.  
He stopped when he saw Jaehyun was actually crying, rubbing the bright red prints his fingers has left on his pale wrist. He sighed, damn it Jibeom how could you!  
\- Look Jaehyun, about what I said earlier, I didn’t mean it that way I swear, it’s just that I wanted to see you smile so badly but you kept covering your mouth with your hands, why would you do that!  
He took a glimpse at the boy in front of him, finding him titling his head. Cute, he thought.  
\- I like you Jaehyun, literally since the first time I saw you, and I want you to be mine, would you?  
Jaehyun doesn’t respond, instead he walked away, almost trying to escape.  
Jibeom stood there dumbfounded, he didn’t see that coming, he was the one being chased for his whole life, has he been just rejected? He felt a loud thump in his heart, was this what they call heartbreak?  
Jaehyun doesn’t sit with them for lunch the next day, instead, he installed himself on a far table, all alone.  
Jibeom felt guilty and his friends’ nagging wasn’t helping either, so he headed towards him.  
\- Why aren’t you sitting with us?  
Jaehyun ignores. Jibeom exhaled the continued sharply:  
\- Look, about what I said yesterday, I didn’t mean it. I don’t like you, I mean I don’t like you that way and I’m definitely sorry about what I said during lunch so can you please join us?  
\- I know I’m not worth your feelings, almighty Jibeom, just leave me alone.  
\- Well if you’re not coming voluntarily, I’m taking you by force! Jibeom's temper was aggravating, so he forcefully grabbed jaehyun’s tray.  
Jaehyun held back, trying to pull it down; his attempt to fight back took the male hovering over him of guard, so he accidently let go, and as result, food was spilled all over Jaehyun’s face and clothes. When his mind finally processed what happened, the boy was already storming out, the scene must have earned attention because almost everyone abandoned their meal and looked at him.  
\- Jibeom, what’s wrong with you? What did Jaehyun do, for you to publicly humiliate him like this!  
Donghyun snapped at him, he fucked up so hard, Jibeom thinks.  
\- What are you waiting for! Go apologize!  
Joochan’s angry voice reached his ears as well, his legs started to move carrying him out of the cafeteria.  
He paused outside for a moment, thinking where he would go, he headed towards the bathroom eventually, and as he expected he found him there. Jaehyun wasn’t washing up like he guessed; instead he was sitting down, knees pulled up to his chest and head buried in between. Jibeom felt guilt filling him; he kneeled carefully in front of him.  
\- Jaehyun, I didn’t mean it I swear, I’m really sorry.  
Jaehyun looked up and Jibeom felt guilt trapping him even more when he saw his tears streaming down through his rosy cheeks, leftovers filling his face and neck. Great job Jibeom! You made him cry twice in two days in row! He thought to himself.  
\- Jaehyun..  
He whispered gently, the boy kept staring at him, not replying back.  
\- Jaehyun .. it was an accident, I swear ..  
\- He saw that .. he saw all of it .. he must think I’m pathetic .. I’m a loser ..  
Jaehyun’s frail voice cut him off, coming out all weak, all shaking.  
\- You’re not, you’re not Jaehyun, oh god I’m sorry  
He pulled him into a tight hug, not caring if he was going to get some dirt on his brand new leather sweater.

Jaehyun went back to hang with them but Jibeom could still feel that he was being careful around him, he could feel how the boy would think twice before speaking as if he was expecting Jibeom to hurt him.  
Things get better after that, not perfect but still better. Jaehyun eventually forgave him and started to behave almost normally, but still cautious. Jibeom felt relieved.

Somehow they ended up together on the university garden one afternoon. There was only the two of them, each occupying an extremity of the bench. It was awkward, and even though Jibeom didn’t look at Jaehyun directly, he knew the boy hung his head low, fingers fidgeting nervously on his lap. He sighted, he didn’t want to make him uncomfortable so he decided to leave.  
\- Ji- Jibeom.. I was wondering, if you already have a roommate in the dorm.. Or maybe.. You’d like to share the room with me?!  
Jaehyun’s voice came out all weak and small, the moment he was just about to stand up and leave.  
“no, I’m sorry but I hate dorm life, I have already my own apartment nearby” he should have reply, yet instead he nodded while saying :  
\- Yeah , why not.  
Jaehyun let out a long breath he didn’t know he was holding, as if he was relieved.  
\- It’s because I already know you, I didn’t want to end up with a random person.. thank you Jibeomie..  
It’s been so long since he last heard Jaehyun call him that way, so he couldn’t help but grin so stupidly.

It was a bad idea, Jibeom thinks when he finally moved in. Not because the room is quiet small nor because dorm life wasn’t really his style, but because he has to see Jaehyun for the whole day now.  
It was suffocating, as if he was lost in a desert, on a very hot day, water is just nearby, yet he can’t drink.  
Jaehyun was within his reach, but he couldn’t hold him, because he wasn’t his to begin with. He would never, and at this point Jibeom feels like being stabbed over and over.  
Sometimes, he wished for Jaehyun to make him hate him, but the boy looked like an angel, and he behaved accordingly. It shows when he wakes him gently in the morning, with a light tap on his shoulder so he won’t miss his first lecture, when he buys snacks for both of them even though Jibeom knows well he’s financially struggling, when he wakes up to use the bathroom at night and doesn’t even turn on the lights to not wake him up, it was the small things Jaehyun does out of kindness that made him fall for him even deeper.  
Jibeom considers confession, sometimes, but every time he gathers up his courage to do so, he stops abruptly, because first he reminisces his first sudden confession, and how Jaehyun simply ran away, and second, because he heard from donghyun, that it hasn’t been that long since the boy broke up with his boyfriend and it was obvious that he wasn’t perfectly healed.  
He was content with the little contact he could get from him nonetheless, like how their fingers brush against each other when Jaehyun hands him a hot cup of coffee in the morning, like how Jaehyun would pout after losing to him in a game, then let Jibeom pinch his cheeks, like how Jaehyun would come out of the shower, all fresh, all smelling nice, and would just kneel in front of him, asking him to comb his hair, and Jibeom would gladly do so.  
\- You’re so nice to me, thank you, Jibeomie. Jaehyun opens up one day  
\- Yeah.. whatever. he plays it cool, even though he was melting inside with how his nickname coming out cutely from the plump lips. 

Jibeom somehow grow to like winter.  
It was raining so hard one late night, thunders could be heard as if it was in their own room. Jibeom wasn’t someone who could be scared of such stuff, he just couldn’t sleep because of the noise.  
Jaehyun was scared though.  
\- Jibeomie, are you awake?  
He could feel the trembling voice and a gentle tap on his shoulder, he turned around to see Jaehyun kneeling next to his bed, pillow held to tight into his arms, shaking so hard.  
\- Jaehyun, are you okay?  
\- C-Can we.. join our... beds together? Ji-Jibeomie.. I’m sorry.. I’ m scared.  
Jibeom doesn’t reply though, he just nodded as he watched Jaehyun bringing his bed next to his. It felt like he couldn’t breath anymore, his imagination worked hard as he come to realize that they’re basically sleeping together. He turned his face to the wall, averting his attention from the boy laying few centimeters away, hoping he could fall asleep as soon as possible.  
He couldn’t.  
His ears caught what it sounded like muffled sobs, he turned around only to see Jaehyun trembling even harder, burying his face in the pillow in his arms. Worry took over him so he instantly leant closer to him.  
\- Jaehyun .. are you okay?  
\- Oh my .. god .. I-I’m sorry .. you .. you woke .. up .. be-because .. of .. of me.. I .. I ..  
Jaehyun stuttered between his sobs, Jibeom get even closer and pulled him so he was laying on his back, he then hovered over him.  
\- It’s okay Jaehyun ... it’s okay .. it will stop in a while.  
Jaehyun was still crying, his eyes were tightly shut, he extended his arms to Jibeom who dropped his weight on his stomach. Jibeom leant down, wrapping the frail arms around his neck, seeking for more comfort; he found himself now laying on top of the scared boy, he felt his heart was going to explode when the new position made his face get closer to Jaehyun’s with his arms still wrapped around his neck.  
Jibeom couldn’t think straight then, he couldn’t register how his lips were on the boy’s face, pampering the fluffy rosy cheeks with small kisses.  
\- Youngtaekiee.. please.. make it stop .. I’m scared.  
He felt as if a whole bucket of ice was spilled over him. So all this time, Jaehyun was thinking he was someone else, or so, Jaehyun let him kiss him and get closer to him because he thought he was someone else?! He felt his heart shattered into pieces, he wanted to pull away but the grip around his neck was still strong so he stayed still. His lungs ran out of air as he stared at jaehyun’s face beneath his then he thought about kissing him, after all Jaehyun wasn’t in his full sense anyway so he won’t register whatever happens.  
But he wouldn’t, he couldn’t just take advantage of a pure boy like him. So instead, he kept sprawled all over the thin body beneath him. When Jaehyun finally fell asleep, Jibeom could get away and sneak to his bed. His attempt to run away failed because he could feel the latter approach him by instinct and just lay his head on his chest while his arm hugged his waist.  
Jibeom didn’t have the heart to push him away, not when he was this vulnerable and scared, so he just kept staring at the ceiling above, hoping for the night to come to an end.  
When he woke up the next morning, Jaehyun wasn’t laying next to him, the weather seemed to be calm, gloomy anyway, he was glad it was holiday or else he would struggle to go to the university.  
A nice smell sneaked to his nostrils, a delicious one, when he lifted his head up he saw Jaehyun putting some plates neatly on his desk.  
\- Ooh, you’re awake .. good morning!  
He replied with a low “good morning”. It sucked that the first thing he remembered as soon as he woke was Jaehyun mistaking him as another guy. Jaehyun wasn’t his, they were barely friends, but Jibeom felt like he was cheated on, it hurts, it hurts so much when he thinks that the one he forever longed for, has his heart trapped within the hold of someone else, by then, every hope, every dream of a future linking them together, faded.  
\- Come on, get up before the food get cold.  
He compiled, he sat on his bed as Jaehyun approached the desk in front of him.  
\- I made you this to make it up to you, I must’ve disturbed your sleep last night.  
\- You didn’t have to.  
He realized his voice was so raw, so dry that Jaehyun hang his head low with guilt. They started to eat in silence. That was later broke by the same small, full of guilt voice.  
\- I’m sorry Jibeom.. I usually take pills but the weather changed so suddenly and I ran out of them, I’ll make sure that would never happen again, I won’t bother you again, please don’t get mad at me.  
Silly, Jaehyun was just silly, how could he just think that he was a bothersome to him!  
\- What kind of pills?  
He answered instead of just telling him he wasn’t actually upset because of that.  
\- Sedatives.  
\- Since when you started taking them?  
\- The last few weeks of the previous winter, ever since..  
He stopped, Jibeom wanted to urge him to speak further, but he didn’t want to pressure him anymore, but Jaehyun continued nonetheless, this time raising his head, looking up to him, eyes glittering with tears.  
\- Ever since Youngtaek stopped coming home.  
He didn’t know how to respond, his heart sank deep into his chest as he heard the same name coming out of his love’s mouth.  
\- Can I ask why did you two broke up?  
He pretended to be okay as he kept digging further.  
Jaehyun took a deep breath, as he reminisces the painful memories.  
\- We didn’t break up, he dumped me.  
Jibeom was shocked, Jaehyun has been dumped?! He concluded that this Youngtaek guy must have a heart of stone, to just leave such a beautiful creature behind.  
\- I knew Youngtaek since forever, our parents were close friends so we both naturally grew closer to each other, we were clicked to the hips, only bedtime could separate us, well sometimes it didn’t even. We were different though, and as he was the sociable, outgoing one, I’ve always been the introvert, who couldn’t stare at someone in his eyes for straight three seconds. I clang too much to him, I depended a lot on him, I took him for granted.  
Jaehyun stopped and inhaled deeply, he then continued.  
\- We started dating after.. the accident, the one that took my parents’ lives and almost mine away, it was raining so hard when we were driving back from Youngtaek’s family house, there were thunders and storms, the road got slippery and the car overturned. The next time I opened my eyes I was in a hospital, Youngtaek was beside me, and then .. and then ... I was told that my parents passed away, it felt horrible, it hurt so hard .. so hard ..  
By then, Jaehyun buried his face into his hands, releasing painful sobs, Jibeom immediately pulled him into his embrace, the boy returned the hug gladly for a while before lifting his head up.  
\- Please let me finish, I want to let this out.  
Jibeom nodded, arms still wrapping the small frame protectively.  
\- After my parents’ death, I literally had no one besides my grandma and Youngtaek, he was always there for me whenever I needed him. Because of the accident, I’ve developed some kind of trauma that hearing thunders would throw me into a harsh panic attack, and whenever it happened, Youngtaek was always there to embrace me, to secure me into his arms, to tell me that everything will eventually be okay, and it soothed me, it made me feel safe. It was so hard not to fall for him when he was doing so much for me, when I literally lived thanks to him. so I confessed one night, I told him that I’m seeing him more than a friend, and guess what, he said that he was feeling the same way and he was about to confess but he didn’t because of the accident, we started dating ever since.  
Jibeom’s fingers were caressing Jaehyun’s hair, jealousy creepy into his heart as the crying boy talked about that.  
\- I wasn’t a good boyfriend, I annoyed him so much. We made it to the university and we both moved here so we were officially living together. I guess that was when Youngtaek discovered what I really was, you know that you don’t know what a really person is actually unless you live with them under the same roof right? It was the same, I failed to adjust so I couldn’t make any friend, instead I just clang to him, I felt bad for it, whenever he wanted to go out with his friends, watch a game, participate in some after college activities, I threw a tantrum and didn’t let him because I was afraid of feeling lonely, loneliness meant always darks thoughts for me. And he didn’t, he was so tolerant, instead, he would cancel all his plans and just snuggle with me in our room in the dorm. I was so selfish, I knew that I was draining so much of his energy but I didn’t care, I was the orphan one, I was the broken one, I needed attention and he was the only one who could give me that! I took him for granted until he fed up one day when I didn’t let him attend his cousin wedding, he was tired of my guts, so he just yelled at me that he was so sick of me, so tired of me, and that if it wasn’t due to the fact I was pathetic he would’ve broke up with me ages ago, and so he did, he came back the next day to gather up his stuff, I begged him to stay by my side.. to not leave me.. I promised that I would never stand in his way.. but he didn’t listen.. he was so mad to do so, that he didn’t even turn around to look at me, he didn’t even show up when thunders were breaking the sky down, when I needed him the most..  
At this point Jaehyun broke down into his embrace, Jibeom could only run his hand through the soft dark hair, unable to talk. He wished he could tear his heart wide open and just lock the little broken angel inside, if only he could.  
He understands what Youngtaek did, but he couldn’t blame Jaehyun either, the boy lost his parents, he had no friends and he couldn’t make any other than him, it was expected that he would act in a possessive way, he himself would’ve done the same, in order to not lose the only person he has.  
\- I’m worthless jibeomie .. I’m useless .. I lost him because I was so selfish ... how can I be this ugly..  
You’re not, you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met, I love you!  
He should have said that, but he didn’t.

Winter kept being winter nonetheless, tougher than usual, it rained, it stormed, it thundered for almost every night and it felt like heaven to Jibeom.  
\- You don’t have to take these.  
He ordered the next night as Jaehyun was about to take a pill.  
\- Huh?! But I can’t ..  
\- These will only harm you, you may even get addicted to them. Just bring your bed next to mine.  
\- Are you sure it won’t bother you?  
\- Well, it’s better than having you hallucinating and scaring me in the middle of the night in the long term.  
He cared about his health, that was undeniable. But it was more because he wanted to feel him closer, knowing that Jaehyun will eventually slide to his bed, and their bodies would collide.  
Jaehyun was more than glad to compile, and just as Jibeom expected, the boy crawled to his bed, and they ended snuggling for the rest of the night. And as days passed by, they just stopped joining beds, as Jaehyun automatically laid on Jibeom’s instead.

\- Are you dating? I mean you and Jaehyun ?  
Joochan asked as they were walking side by side on day.  
\- No, Not yet, he wanted to say.  
\- Oh..  
\- What’s with this “Oh” ?  
\- Well, I saw how you kissed his wrist when he handed you the water bottle earlier, I don’t know but friends don’t usually kiss each other’s hands, not in the way you did it anyway.  
He didn’t reply, he just smiled. It was true that he got a little bold with his action towards the latter. It started first when they were going home together, knowing that Jaehyun wasn’t the best road crosser, Jibeom held his hands tight, locking the delicate long fingers between his, not setting them free, not after they crossed the street. And since the boy himself doesn’t retreat his hand, he felt even more encouraged.  
Jibeom upgraded their skinship, he would casually bring the boy’s head, and burry it in his chest, all pretending to be asleep, and sometimes he would plant a soft kiss on the fluffy cheek following by a soft pinch just because he felt like it. It was Jaehyun’s reactions that kept pushing him further, he swore he could see the little smile on his lips, as the blood rushed to his cheeks.  
\- Are in you in love with Jaehyun?  
It was Donghyun this time and Jibeom couldn’t help but wonder if he was being too obvious.  
\- Well, just in case you are, just please don’t hurt him. He’s been hurt enough.  
Donghyun doesn’t wait for his reply when he said that. I won’t, I would never.

\- Kim Jibeom! Isn’t it about time to start doing your stuff by your own? Jaehyun is not your maid! Jangjun said while they were having lunch one day.  
He was right though, ever since he moved with Jaehyun to the dorm, it was the latter who always took care of everything. Jaehyun would arrange his – their- bed, make breakfast, wash the dishes, sweep the floor, do the laundry, clean the bathroom and so on. Jibeom wasn’t really fond of typical chores and seeing how Jaehyun was doing everything diligently and without complaining, he gets even lazier.  
\- Have you complained to Jangjun hyung! He faked hurt while looking straightly at the love of his life, whose face started to panick.  
\- N-No I .. I didn’t real-..  
\- Oh he didn’t, Jangjun said, I asked him what he was going to do this afternoon since he has no class and if he wants to go to the library to study, but he said he has to go back to dorm because you ran out of clean socks so he has to wash them with his own hands ا with soap because your toes are sensitive to the machine’s detergent. Seriously Kim Jibeom stop taking advantages of the boy!  
\- Jibomie has nothing to do with it really, Jaehyun hurriedly said in his defense, I’m really doing it willingly it’s not like he’s forcing me to do anything!  
\- You really like being his slave don’t you! Jangjun teased back and Jaehyun was a blushing mess.  
\- You see what roommates do for each other’s? When will you? Joochan nudged Donghyun.  
\- Your roommate in heaven might, but I won’t! the other snapped back.  
Meanwhile, Jibeom couldn’t take his eyes from Jaehyun, his boy, wondering if he could possibly love him even more than he already does!  
After finishing with his lunch, Jibeom went to the bathroom to wash up. And while he was washing his hands, the sweet familiar Jasmin scent reached his nostrils, it didn’t take him so long to realize that Jaehyun was standing near.  
\- Jibeomie, I’m sorry, the boy was looking down, his fingers playing with the hem of his shirt.  
\- Huh?! Why are you apologizing? Jibeom dumbfoundedly asked.  
\- Because of what happened earlier, I swear I wasn’t complaining when I told Jangjun hyung about washing your socks for real! I’m afraid the others would think badly about you!  
Bong Jaehyun will be the reason for his death for real! He turned to him after drying his hands, and cupped the soft fluffy cheeks.  
\- Hey, look at me, you know how much Jangjun hyung likes joking! And the others are my friends they already know how dirty I am, okay?  
He ruffled his hair and then pulled him into a tight hug.  
\- Besides he’s kind of right, I mean ever since I moved to the dorm, it was you who always did all the chores, not even the one we should take turn on doing it, but you’re even doing my own chores, he’s right, you’re not my slave Jaehyun!  
\- But I like doing it! Jaehyun pulled back and looked at him with sparkling eyes, I want to take care of you just like how you’re taking care of me, i just want you to be comfortable and I’ll do everything for your comfort. I’ll do whatever you like and I’ll be whatever you like, your maid, your slave, anything, just order me around okay?  
Jibeom’s heart felt like bursting, and like being hypnotized, he gently pushed Jaehyun to the wall and leaned in to kiss him. and just before their lips could brush, a voice startled them.  
\- Get a room you too would you!  
Jibeom tsked, he totally forgot about Joochan being in the bathroom cabin! Jaehyun hurriedly excused himself and went out running.  
\- That was a love confession wasn’t it? Joochan was grinning at him stupidly.  
\- Yeah but you totally ruined the moment, couldn’t you at least wait for a while longer there!  
\- I can’t let you guys have your first kiss in a bathroom! Take him somewhere nice and kiss him all you want!  
He was right! Jibeom thought, better days are coming soon! 

They almost kissed one night, almost.  
He had Jaehyun sitting on the floor in front of him, holding Jibeom’s left foot in his hands to treat his intertrigo between his toes while the right one laid comfortably on Jaehyun’s lap, caressing the fluffy thigh beneath from time to time.  
Jaehyun looked ethereal as he stared at him from above, especially now that he had the crazy idea of dying his head blonde. His eyes wondered as the long sunny locks wobbled around the creamy face. His outfits weren’t helping either, not the black shorts, exposing half of his porcelain thighs, definitely not the extremely oversized, barely buttoned shirt, hanging off his shoulders.  
Jibeom lifted his free foot to rest his heel on the crook of his neck, as he playfully poked the chubby cheek with his toes. He was surprised by Jaehyun’s reaction though, the blonde looked up through his curtain like eyelash, then closed his eyes to fully lean his cheeks onto his sole. The small action made Jibeom throw all of his guards, so he pulled him up by his armpits and made him sit on his lap.  
Jaehyun instinctively circled his arms around his neck, side colliding with the latter’s chest. Jibeom’s fingers reached for the few buttons and teared them open. And as if he was hypnotized, his lips roamed all over the small body in his embrace, kissing every inch of his chest, his collarbones, his neck, his jaw, and stopped on his chin as he heard a loud knock on the door as donghyun’s voice echoed through the corridor.  
\- Bong Jaehyun! Where are you? You promised to help me with my report!  
With that, Jibeom pulled back, his eyes breaking through Jaehyun’s , he sighed and then nodded as if he was giving him permission to go, the blonde doesn’t get off instantly though, he kept looking at Jibeom with unreadable expression, then he stood up attempting to storm out of the room.  
\- Jaehyun wait ..  
He threw some pants and a jacket at him, he wasn’t going to allow random people take a glimpse of the beautiful body for sure. He felt satisfied seeing how the boy obeyed instantly.  
It took Jaehyun so long to come back, and when he does, Jibeom pretended to be asleep, afraid to make the situation awkward between them, especially that they almost made out.  
Jibeom felt relieved when the sweet smell reached his nostrils as Jaehyun carefully dropped himself next to his pretending-to-be-asleep roommate, burying his nose on the latter’s back. Jibeom immediately turned over and pulled the small head deep into his chest. It was funny how they were similar in term of height yet Jaehyun always felt smaller, his body was so frail, so delicate as if he would break if he hugged him harder than he should, and it always amazed him how he perfectly fit in his embrace, as if he was made to lay right there, between his arms.  
Jibeom smiled at the thought and nuzzled his nose deeper into the soft bleached locks, inhaling the sweet scent of jasmine shampoo coming out of them.  
When he woke up the next morning, Jaehyun was still there, awake with a soft smile on his plump lips.  
\- You’re awake? Good morning Jibeomie  
\- Good morning, when did you wake up?  
\- A while ago, I just was afraid you’d wake up earlier than you should if I move.  
Jibeom responded by planting soft kisses on the fluffy cheeks, then moved to peck the rest of his face. It was always the latter’s reaction that drove him further, always the faint yet obvious blush and the shy smile appearing on his mouth.  
Butterflies kept dancing on his stomach even after they went on different paths for their lectures.  
\- Can’t you just date him! you’re making a foul of yourself. Joochan snapped after the first lecture ended, in which he failed to register a word from his professor, mind too busy reminiscing Jaehyun’s taste all over his lips.  
\- You think .. he responded, a foolish grin appearing on his face.  
\- Of course! Seriously Jibeom you’ve stopped being .. well YOU ever since Jaehyun appeared in your life, just date him!  
\- You think .. he repeated, still with the same stupid smile.  
\- Urghhhh please! All you two do is touch and touch and touch so why not just make it official!  
\- Well, I have to go, Jaehyun’s lecture has probably ended, I’ll go ..  
He didn’t hear Joochan whispering “stupid”, because he hurriedly went out to Jaehyun’s class, they’ve been separated for barely 2 hours but he already missed him like crazy and all he could think of is wrapping the latter’s body in his embrace.  
He saw the blonde locks when he reached the classroom’s door, but he halted his steps when he realized that Jaehyun wasn’t actually alone, a tall with a broad shoulders figure stood next to him, the guy was running his hands all over his Jaehyun’s arms, he was whispering in a desperate tone that Jibeom could hear clearly:  
\- Jaehyun-ah, can’t we go back to how we’ve been like before?  
The guy posed for few seconds before pulling Jaehyun into a tight hug  
\- I miss you so much Jaehyun, so freaking much please come back to me..  
Jibeom felt fire stirring through his spin, and all he could think of was ripping the guy of his beloved Jaehyun, and he actually attempted to until Jaehyun’s voice reached his ear  
\- O- Okay …  
It was a simple word, so low, so short, but it was enough to crumble down his world. He stood there for few more seconds watching the two boys hugging tightly before he stormed out to the parking lot where his car was. He was panting so hard, almost gasping for air. It felt like being stabbed over and over, the Jaehyun he was madly in love with, the Jaehyun he kissed, the Jaehyun he touched, the Jaehyun he slept every night next to, just simply agreed to go back to his ex-boyfriend as if he meant nothing, as If he was nothing! Okay, they weren’t exactly boyfriends or dating, but he believed there was something between them and it was a matter of confession, so all the touches meant nothing for him? was Jaehyun just using him to fill the void Youngtaek left upon their breakup! So now they’re back together he’s no longer needed! He gripped the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles hurt, a single tear slipped through his cheeks, he felt so used, so hurt that it was so hard to breath.  
He couldn’t register how much time he spent in his car, staring into nothing and everything, ignoring all the calls he received from both Joochan and Jaehyun, until the day was coming to an end and he decided to attend his last lecture. He should probably stop being a pathetic loser and make more foul of himself.  
\- Jibeom where have you b—holy crap why do you look like that?  
I hate you Bong Jaehyun, he thought to himself, never has he showed his weakness but now he felt that his emotions were so bare and exposed for the world to see.  
\- I .. I’m kind of sick. He responded with a dry voice, which didn’t fail to make Joochan believe that he actually was.  
\- You should have at least called you know, Jaehyun was so worried because you didn’t answer his calls that he barely ate his lunch.  
He smiled so bitterly at what Joochan said. Was Jaehyun pulling some kind of acts towards him? does he enjoy torturing him that much! The thing is, he can’t even get mad at him, he can’t even tell Joochan how betrayed he felt when they weren’t even dating in the first. So all he could do was just suck in all the pain.  
\- He brought your book, he said you needed it for one of your lectures today but you left it at the dorm, he really memorize your schedules so well doesn’t h..  
\- Joochan can you please shut up, I’m not really in the mood!  
He couldn’t believe he actually snapped at the innocent Joochan when he has nothing to do with his twisted emotions, he felt guilt trapping him.  
\- I’m sorry really, I didn’t mean to, I’m really not fine.  
\- It’s okay I understand, rest well Jibeom and let’s talk tomorrow when you’re better.  
He was grateful that Joochan was so understanding, so he gave him a thank you smile.

He went back to the dorm later in the evening to find Jaehyun resting his head on his desk, as if he fell asleep waiting for him, his bitter smile floated up at the thought. And being the light sleeper he was, Jaehyun woke up as soon as Jibeom stepped in the room and closed the door.  
\- Jibeomie, where have you been? Are you okay? Why you didn’t answer my calls, I was so worried!  
Jaehyun kept mumbling in a panicking voice as he threw himself into his arms. Jibeom almost lost it, almost circled that latter’s body in his embrace, but he held himself together in the last moment and peeled him off.  
\- I got sick so I took the day as a rest.  
Jaehyun, not giving up after being pushed away from the hug, held Jibeom’s hand between his thin fingers.  
\- Did you eat something? Are you okay now? You should have called me, we could’ve seen a doctor and ..  
\- Jaehyun-ah!  
He couldn’t believe how harsh his voice came out of his and how harsh he yanked his hands, but he kept telling himself that this is what should be done.  
\- Jaehyun-ah  
He said this time, while full tuning to face him, directly looking into his eyes.  
\- I’m leaving  
\- W-where? A-are you … going somewhere?  
He could sense the trembling and the fear in his voice, but he shouldn’t back off now, he’ll just end up hurting himself more if he stayed.  
\- I’ll leave the dorm, I’ll go back to my apartment, for good!  
\- Huh ?! W-why ..?!  
He almost gave up when he saw how pitiful Jaehyun looked, with his trembling lips and his sparkling eyes, alerting that tears will be spilled soon. But he ignored all of it as he proceeded to grab his suitcase and started to gather his stuff.  
\- Is .. is it because .. of .. of me? I’m sorry, I’m sorry Jibeomie , please let’s pretend nothing happened and …  
\- Not everything is about you you know !  
He snapped at him so hard as he didn’t let the now-shaking boy finish his sentence. He approached him dangerously, fire spilling from his eyes, he wanted nothing more than hurting him, than making him feel all the pain he felt and more. Jaehyun kept stepping backward until his back hit the wall and he was literally trapped between Jibeom’s body and the wall.  
\- Not everything is about you, he repeated, The world doesn’t revolve around you, Bong Jaehyun! So stop with your selfishness would you!!  
Jaehyun was too shocked to answer back, his pupils were shaking and his lips were trembling so hard. Jibeom’s breath mixed with his spit was all over on his face for a while before the latter pulled back to continue packing his stuff.  
Jaehyun sat on the ground, pulling, his knees up to his chest while tears were running silently all over his face. He kept watching Jibeom stuffing his things carelessly into his suitcase, as if he wanted to get out from the room as quickly as possible, and when he’s done Jibeom left carrying his luggage, not even sparing the boy on the floor a glance.


End file.
